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That sound

Deidre and I went out on a date on Friday night, going to dinner and then to see a movie (we saw "In Her Shoes", which I thought was quite good). During the movie I heard something.


That sound. You know the one. Of 'escaping wind'.

This is something I've gotten used to, as she lets her wind escape in places that she feels comfortable with, or where she thinks people won't hear her. But people often do hear her, and she says 'excuse me', which is great. It means we can go back again, where she does it again. But hey, as long as she says 'excuse me', they keep letting us back.

I think the cinema floor shook when she let her wind escape. I looked at her, and she smiled. I hoped no one else noticed, and grinned back.

When we were going back to the car, which was on the 7th floor, we jumped into the elevator. There was another couple in it with us, and we rode the elevator quietly.


I looked at Deidre, and she hid her head in her hand. The other couple pretended they didn't hear, but I noticed the lady's eyes flicker to look at who violated her airspace, but she stopped herself and kept looking ahead. I looked at Deidre again, and she was still hiding her head in her hand, shaking it as if she couldn't believe she'd just done that in the elevator. I couldn't help it – I burst out laughing. The lady smiled cautiously at me, and Deidre squeaked, 'excuse me'. The door opened and the other couple left. It closed, and I continued laughing. I couldn't help it!

That was the hilarious ending to a nice night.

It reminds me of when I was going out with Michelle, 5 years ago. We were living together for about a month, and one day I said to her, "Michelle…. you know, farting is natural. It's ok to fart every now and again. I haven't heard you fart at all, so you're probably hoping you don't offend me, but it's ok." She breathed a great sigh of relief and agreed with me, that she hadn't wanted to offend me.

From then on, she was farting all the time! It was amazing! After another month or so of this, I said to her, "Christ you fart a lot!" She looked at me in surprise.

"I thought you wanted me to fart?" she asked.

"What are you talking about?" I said.

"Well, you said it's ok to fart, and so I thought you wanted me to. I thought you had a fart fetish or something, and I was trying to cater to that."


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